round 3

November 29th – Harrisburg, PA
Matt picked me up from the airport at 1:30 and by 2:30 we were already on the road. We ran out of gas twice within half an hour, the second time not within walking distance to a gas station. We played a shakey first show and even though I hadn’t been gone 12 hours things had already began to shake up back home. I use to wonder what it felt like to always walk on solid ground, but now I know I have no interest in solid ground and that I am only interested in keeping myself standing on whatever is below my feet.

November 30th – Olean, NY
Olean is cold and there is snow all around me. We talked in the van about hording vegetable oil and burying it underground to collect the next time we come through an area. I could not enjoy myself playing tonight…I have no idea why. Every note I played sounded wrong, my fingers were never where I wanted them to be. Every movement I made seemed phony and I felt like everyone can see right through me even though I have nothing to hide.

December 1 – Cleveland. OH.
Today was the most absurd off day I have ever had. Within an hour of waking up I began arguing over text messages. I turned off my phone and took a shower, turned it back on and continued to argue until we got to the Rock n Roll hall of fame. I really wonder how this place stays open, because I cant imagine that there is a lot of interest in seeing Kurt Cobains guitar. I mean, yeah it was played by Kurt Cobain, but its still just a fucking guitar. The whole rock n roll hall of fame is a place that sort of pinpoints everything I find wrong with a lot of pop culture – the rock n roll hall of fame tells us that we should care about these guitars because these important people played them, when really, its just a guitar. Lots of people have them, and lots of people play them and write songs. The Rock n Roll Hall of Fame tells us that we should care about ordinary things that ordinary people do ordinary things with because they do it in front of a lot of people, that because of this all of these ordinary things are special. Its because of places like the Rock N Roll Hall of Fame and the culture that surrounds those kind of people and those ideas that cause ordinary people like Kurt Cobain to blow their fucking brains out.

After the HOF we went to a shitty armature stand up comedy thing, took part in the shooting of a Christmas Ale video and I think I almost got mugged.

After that Kyle, Sam and I ate a whole lot of chocolate.

December 2nd – Dayton. OH
We played at the Dayton Dirt Collective in Dayton, OH and it is exactly the kind of space I want to open in Atlanta. I get very sad that we don’t have a space like that and I feel like I could do it if I just bit the bullet and did it. When we were driving a deer ran across the road and it was the closest I have ever been to killing an animal. I fought with my parents and I am not really sure why.

December 3rd – OFF in Dayton, OH
I think I am all about learning things the hard way. The past three months I have been learning lessons about tour life all the hard way…more specifically about relationships at home. You cant control what people do when you are gone, and you can’t control how they will handle you being gone.

I have this issue where I have epiphanies or realizations at the last possible minute and only get to enjoy the fruits of my proverbial lightbulb for a short amount of time. I have 4 days left of tour this year and obviously this is no exception.

December 4th – Louisville, KY
Skull Alley is just as awesome as the Dayton Dirt Collective. Its really cold in Lousiville. We are staying with Micha and I realized that back in January I slept in his bed when I was on tour with Worn in Red. He had left for the night his roommates said I could sleep in his bed if I so desired. So I did. The look on Micha’s face when I told him that I think I have slept in his bed before was without question the most befuddled and awkward expression I have ever seen and I will cherish it for as long as I live.

December 5th – Murfreesboro, TN
Watching a band called Zombie Bazooka Patrol play a set and sing songs about zombies eating humans and embracing the transformation to zombies doesn’t really hit home when the band decides not to dress up in their makeup for the show. Something about all of it just doesn’t click.

December 6th – Knoxville, TN
We are playing at a convention to a bunch of nerds tonight. Nerds, when rallied together, are an interesting group. We are the outsiders, and this is their event. One little fat kid with braces smarted off to me. Another asked me to leave “their spot” where they had been sitting. I don’t take much offense to any of this because when they aren’t spending their weekends in conventions they are sitting at their computers or playing rock band or playing D&D. Let them eat cake every once in a while.

December 7th – Chattanooga, TN
We played with the Sadistic Scenic City Sideshow tonight and for being people that stable paper money to their chests and who nail crosses to their hand and swallow goldfish and walk on glass all of them were some of the sweetest people I have ever encountered. By now I feel like I should be hardened and that there should be no surprises…that spending time with a man that makes vomit videos would prove to me that no one is really how they seem, but I was really caught off guard at how un-abrasive, genuine and gentle the Sadistic Sideshowers were. I told them to hit me up if they were ever in Atlanta and I would take care of them…I would love to have them as houseguests someday.

December 8th – Marietta, GA
The last show of tour. It doesn’t feel like tour is over, but it is over. A rather anti-climatic way to end a good 3 months of my life, but its over. It doesn’t feel like tour is over. Tomorrow I will wake up in my bed. I will wake up in my bed every day for a long time. Tour is over and I start working again soon. I start trying to make money again. I start saving money again. Tomorrow I have nothing to do and that makes me really anxious and nervous. I have nothing to do tomorrow and I am scared that I will fall back in to being complacent in being bored and ignoring opportunity. Tonight was the last show of tour and it certainly starting to feel like tour is over.